How do I solve my problems?

I think I know the beginning of my binge eating disorder but where do I start to make a change?

I had always been overweight as a child and this led to self-esteem issues and a severe lack of confidence during my early years. In fact I dispised myself, I felt ugly and different to everyone else and even had suicidal thoughts. At 15 I changed things, I went on an restricted diet and lost 5 stone, my confidence greatly improved and I no longer suffered from "depression."

However, at 17 I began to eat again and then I would eat more and more, to the point of feeling sick. This has continued and now I have put 4 stone on again. My confidence has gone, I feel inferior to other people, the self-hatred and worthlessness of my younger years has come back to haunt me and I am afraid. I really don't want to go back to where I was then, I don't want to feel the way I did then and it is really affecting my life. I feel like I am unworthy of my friends, family and job.

During all of these years, however, I don't think I ever actually loved myself and I think this is where the problem is. I just don't know how you begin to love yourself? I don't know where to start, I don't even know what it feels like to respect yourself.

If you can give me some advice on this I would greatly appreciate it.

Many Thanks


ANSWER

How do you begin to love yourself?

As children we all instinctively love ourselves.
In fact if you ask a 3 year old little girl if they are beautiful... the answer if a VERY confident "YES!" Just the other day my four year old daughter stated, "I can do anything".

The truth is that we all have that little child inside us that knows we can do anything. But there is also another part of us that has developed over the years that tells us we can't do it... and not to even try. Each day, each moment, we make a choice of who to listen to.

Start small... maybe its just once today that you listen to that confident child within yourself. And eventually with continued practice; that little voice will begin to naturally be heard more often.

In order to start loving yourself first you must be open to trying things differently. Listen to that confident inner child; and every morning when you wake up go straight to the mirror (before getting 'pretty')... look into your eyes and say "I Love You".

Just like any other habits... it takes time along with repetition to build and maintain. YOU can do this! Be patient and have faith in yourself.

All my Best,

Stefanie