Stress and eating!

by Christine
(Minnesota)

Hey Stefanie, it's Christine again.

I can't tell you how helpful your advice has been! I read your info and watch your videos almost every day. I was just thinking about how stressed out I am almost all the time.

In light of your advice on positive thinking,
I think I might be stressed from my own self-conscious nature. It seems like every second I am thinking about how embarrassed
I am about having opinions or taking up space in the room with people judging me. It is so hard to just BE MYSELF. I can picture it, but to do it right now and love my body right now is so hard. So I am stressed out almost all the time, which leads to binge eating.

What are your thoughts on this? I feel like stress is the biggest reason for my eating...
I'm always feeling like I'm not good enough. That I need to prove myself and please others. Do you ever feel selfish for loving yourself? I've always grown up with the self-imposed idea that serving others and not thinking of yourself is the right way to go. But then my boyfriend mentioned that even though Jesus says to love others, you must love them "as yourself." You have to love yourself, and that is definitely affirmed in scripture.

Has God's love been a big part of your journey? How do you balance His love with your own?

Thanks again!
Christine


ANSWER

Hi Christine,

Yes, stress can be a big issue for binge eaters.
The reason is because it easily, yet temporarily, relieves stress. So whenever we feel uncomfortable (stressed out); its easy to grab a quick fix.

The problems are the consequences that comfort eating (binge eating, emotional eating) bring. I'm sure you are well aware of the guilt and shame that comes after binging. Along with that comes the weight gain and shattered self confidence. Believe me; I know what it feels like!! It is not a fun place to be.

The thing you need to remember right now is that it will not happen overnight. It takes time to regain (or create) that self confidence.

Is it selfish to love yourself?

Well that depends on your definition of loving yourself. If it means that you ignore others to pamper and lavish yourself with the "frivolous"; then yes that is selfish (and I'm willing to bet that isn't your problem!).

But if loving yourself means to take the time to eat right, exercise and develop 'emotional fitness'; then it is a far cry from being selfish. It actually enables you to give MORE to those around you. When you are balanced and happy; it rubs off on people and you can reach out in ways that you cannot when you are not 'emotionally fit'. You cannot lift anyone else up unless you are on higher and humble ground.

Without getting too deep into my own spiritual beliefs... I'd like to address your last question.

Yes, my relationship with my Heavenly Father has played a large role in overcoming binge eating.
But I don't separate his love from my own. His love for me and others is what gave me the courage to love myself. And from that choice; many great things have happened.

I believe that we are created to live in joy not misery. But it is our choice to pick between the two. That is the gift of this life; the power to choose what we want to experience.

I hope that helps give you the direction you were looking for. And as always... I'm here for any questions you have!

All my Best,

Stefanie

P.S.

Listen to your boyfriend ;) He sounds very wise.